i'm at a loss for words. every accusation taken to heart must be true. but attempting to defeat what won't stop tearing you apart, i've found that i have failed.

i am not one who is open to change. especially trying to change myself. but i have never wanted to do it so bad until now.

i would sell my own soul just to even steal a glance at one empty smile.

i find myself completely void of reason. i have become one huge tangled mess of arteries and valves. my heart has overtaken my head, but i don't know which hurts more.

to hear your imperfections so straightforward from the eyes of one who should see you as perfect almost kills me.

but the pain is not so much what makes me want to disappear. rather. not being able to erase my flaws. erase the anger. erase the little things that we just can't let go.

tending to ask for too much, and asking for different things, only creates war.

but why does the word pathetic have to play such a key role. could i not just stay silent and still communicate. could i for once not feel as if i can't let go.

feeling broken and useless now won't even compare to what will happen in a matter of time.

in a matter of time, i will be insignificant. i will be a note written down on a crumpled up piece of paper thrown into a box with a mess of other things. i will be a cd of sad songs. i will be a pathetic collection of memories waiting to collect dust and fade. meaningless hope promising for a brighter future, but honest deception that foretells of an empty heart in a big city.

let us feel the impact of what we are soon to face. then let us think about why this is worth doing. then let us realize that time is short. then let us love with no insincerity.

let us never ask for closure.

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i'm pretty sure that i can't take anymore. before you take a swing. i wonder, what are we fighting for. when i say out loud i want to get out of this. i wonder is there anything i'm going to miss. (yes.) i wonder, how's it gonna be. when you don't know me. how's it gonna be. when you're sure i'm not there. how's it gonna be when there is no one there to talk to, between you and me. cause i don't care (not.) how's it gonna be. where we used to laugh, there's a shouting match. sharp as a thumbnail scratch a silence i can't ignore. wanna taste the soul of your skin. the soft dive of oblivion. oblivion.

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keep on telling me time is no enemy.
<3 frances